Just talk about…Collections.

When tasked with the assignment to write a memoir about my late grandfather, I happily accepted, recalling all the great facts and figures about his life, his stories and how everything was intertwined within all the inter-family drama that has occurred before my generation. I’d assumed that because of this, I would be firmly capable of writing something amazing in my memory of him. Only afterwards did I realise how little I really knew about him as a person.

Being young, and honestly not really curious, growing up for me without seeing basically half of my extended family wasn’t really out of the ordinary in my mind — I’d only knew my maternal grandmother and great-grandmother in the family tree, never really questioning why we never saw the entirety of my maternal grandfather. Only about 5 years ago, when a series of rather interesting events happened, that I was able to piece together the underlying blocks of an overall fascinating story.

It was 5 years ago, after much contact was broken between my family and the side of my maternal grandmother – we regained contact with the other half of the family, and only then had I realised that the story of my extended family was much more complicated than I had thought originally. On a pretty sleepy afternoon, we drove to the car-park beside the famous Boon Lay Nasi Lemak stall, where we met with my Grand-Uncle Alan. A friendly figure who greeted us with an ever-wide smile and cheerful demeanor, he arranged this reunion between long-separated family, and showed us the way to my grandfather’s house. Being caught perhaps a little by surprise, I was reaffirmed with information from my mother just hours ago that “this side of the family is impossibly nice”.

After a few minutes, we arrived at my grandfather’s house, a small HDB flat in Boon Lay. Having prior knowledge that he was a collector, however, did nothing to conceal my surprise in the sheer amount of items that he collected in his small flat. Collections of vinyl, statues, cigarette boxes and sweet drink wrappers lay casually around the main living room area. This was obviously, not the only items in his collection, as he also collected various other items such as Chairman Mao items that engulfed an entire room, comprised of badges, statues, portraits and other small trinkets, a second room filled with other items such as paintings, drawings, vinyls and folders of coins, and a third room with vases, and other porcelain things; all of which I don’t know the value of, only that it meant the world to him.

Entering the room also, of course, I got to see my grandfather for the first time in my life, a figure that was still graceful with age, and treated us to Coffee and Milo (for my sister). One of my mother’s  most vivid memories of him is when he first caught sight of Ashley, where she claimed “his eyes lit up” at the sight of her for the first time. There, Grand-Uncle Alan also played a documentary made by Mediacorp about his life, where I really got a glimpse of the man who I’ve never met until now.

An avid collector, the documentary claims that he has collected over 30,000 coins, 3000 Vinyl records, 3000 Chairman Mao badges and a thousand sweet drink wrappers, of course this collection has grown since the making of that video, with some of his new collections being that of moon cake boxes and other such items. However, more interesting than the collection itself, is the man behind it. From young, he traveled to Singapore and grew up among a large family, however, as he stated himself, he always “grew up in loneliness” even though there was such a large family alongside him.

A man of little words, his mindset resembled one that wanted to give people the least trouble as possible, while enjoying himself to the fullest. However, being a father of three children at that time, his own obsession with his collection, and this mindset came to a head in the 1980s, where he and his wife got a divorce, which ended up in a court case sometime later, with him needing to be bailed out of jail by his family, as he chose to serve jail rather than agree to a settlement. This is one of the few examples of why I believe that he is one of the most unique characters I have ever met in my life, one who is determined to do things out of his own happiness, willing to give up every other aspects of his life, in the pursuit of what he wants to do, to collect items from all over the world which pleases him. Eventually, this led to his divorce and other family drama, but I’m quite sure he wouldn’t be too bothered with the whole situation, as he could continue expanding his collection in a wide array of items.

From there, I’ve met him on average about two times a year from then on, with him never failing to prepare our favourite Fuzhou Fish-Balls every Chinese New Year for us until he was no longer able to. He always took pride in his collection, and showed us around his vast array of items every time we were around – I took particular interest in the war badges that he collected, as well as the various wrappers and other nostalgic collections. For the others – I guess I don’t possess much of the collector’s blood that runs through my grandfather, but he looked upon all his items as little treasures, laminating, filing, and displaying each item in plain sight, or in easily accessible folders, where he could glance upon each item at any time – no item ever neglected. However, besides small moments of small talk, I could never really fully talk to him, till this day I’m not very sure it was down to sheer awkwardness or the fact that I couldn’t think of anything to really talk to him about. He however found much pleasure in listening to Ashley’s stories and about her accomplishments throughout the year.

Throughout his life, always a polarising character, and perhaps a little controversial due to his outlook and attitude towards how he wanted to live his life to the fullest, he remains perhaps the person I am the most impressed by that I’ve met in real life, a man who makes no compromise in the pursuit of his passion, even if it means the loss of family, money or even a bed  to sleep on – he slept on the floor so that he could have more room to store his items.

As such, the title of this writing is a misnomer… I could never do his collections justice just in writing, due to the vast scale of the collections, as well as my own personal disconnect between his hobby of collecting items. What I hope to achieve is to preserve the memories of a man that is totally out of sync with the current society, yet bears lessons that the current society could benefit so much from.

He passed away peacefully on the 14th of  January 2018.